Trying, trying too hard

So today I thought it would be a great idea to to go to a mall. Had a package to pick up,  and a weekday shouldn’t be too busy, right?

Somehow, despite getting twelve thousand emails about Black Friday sales, I forgot that today was Black Friday. 

Still, I tried it. The mall I went to wasn't horribly busy, and largely lit with skylights as opposed to the dreaded fluorescent. I wasn’t very far in before I felt pretty overwhelmed and needed to sit down for a bit. 

I closed my eyes and did some breathing exercises recommended by the Toronto Concussion Clinic. When I felt a little better, I went to a store that seemed quiet for a bit of a break before running the gauntlet of the food court. Then covered my face to get past a store selling perfumey soap and candles, and eventually made it to H&M to pick up my package. 

(Side note here, I ordered three things, only one was available for pickup at the local store, the other two are being shipped.)

Parts of the store are not bad, but each section has different lighting, some worse than others. Eventually I made my way to the cashier and gave them the pickup code in the email. “Oh,” said the person behind the counter, “I don’t need that, I need the order number and ID.” So I give them that and put my phone away. When they come back with the package, they ask for the pickup code. “I gave you that,” I say. “Can I get it again?” Augh. Having to pull out my phone again and unlock it and open my email and find the code again doesn’t sound like a lot for most people, but for a person with a concussion and one arm in a sling is a lot. Extra unnecessary annoyance. 

Part of my plan for the day revolved around the pretzel place being right across from H&M on the way out, so I grabbed a pretzel and went across to the park to rest for a bit before walking back to the bus stop. By then I was headachy, stumbly, and dealing with tinnitus and a bit of nausea. And so, so tired.

So I guess lessons learned are... take breaks (including closing my eyes), move slow, plan breaks, time events to be non-busy times while the sun is up, and don’t go to a mall. 

Except that when got home, there was an email saying the other part of my order shipped—to the store. I don’t know how I did that—actually I do, it’s because I have a head injury and simple tasks are sometimes overwhelming to me and I miss details. Do not like! But I guess the only way up is through.