oy, what a morning

i had a load of blood work to do this morning from the pain specialist! it hat to be done on day 19-20 of my cycle, and required 12-hours' fasting. so i was feeling pretty lousy when i got to the lab this morning, and then had to wait over an hour, and pay out of pocket for some of the tests - a hundred dollars! my insurance had better cover it. just had a late breakfast of a boiled egg and marmalade toast eaten with a knife and fork, since i'm still having trouble eating post-braces-adjustment. now that i've had all the tests done (ten vials of my blood! ten!!) i'm going to start all the supplements he recommended - fish oil, magnesium, more iron, etc. but right now i just want to have a nap!

oh also i can't remember if i posted that i broke down and asked my ortho how much longer - he guessed four to six months, which is not too bad! i just hope they're off before my birthday.

zzzzz

what a week. i realise now just how much i rely on sleep to deal with pain. that is, how much i rely on sleeping ridiculous amounts, like 12 hours a night when i can usually once or twice a week, to ease my back pain. because the pain is kind of manageable if i can just sleep all the time! but, the past few nights, i haven't been able to sleep. i get to sleep ok, and then i wake up. this morning i got up before 2 o'clock and couldn't get back to sleep, in part due to tooth pain (got my braces adjusted again yesterday) and i think hunger (because i couldn't eat post-braces).so, tonight i napped for a couple of hours as soon as my husband got home, set the alarm to get up at 8:30 to eat (tinned salmon and mayo - not exactly gourmet! - but nutritious, lotsa calories, and chewing not required), and will be heading back to bed soon, after giving husband strict instructions that he is to sleep on the sofa and keep his snoring away from me!

Updates

So I saw the pain doc last week! He asked some very interesting questions and did some very interesting tests, and really seemed to take my concerns seriously. He is also a big fan of my physiotherapist (Angus) which was good to hear. He is sending me to a naturopath and to have a whack of bloodwork done, and also ultrasounds on my shoulder and arm, and testing for something called “Thoracic Outlet Syndrome.” Of course I googled it and thought “whoa, this is so me!” All of my symptoms, even the vertigo and tinnitus and chest pain can be associated with it. and some of the work I did with Angus—“nerve flossing” is what he called it, but now I’ve seen it called “nerve gliding” as well—is specifically recommended as a treatment for TOS. So, you can bet I am going to be doing more of that on my own!

I’m really feeling positive that I can get “fixed.” Finally someone who listens instead of saying “maybe it’s just stress” or “maybe you’re just like this.”

Oh but one thing I forgot to mention to him, which comes and goes but was particularly awful yesterday, is pinna pain—specifically stabbing pains in the anti-helix. The pinna is the outer cartilage-y shell of the ear. It is very difficult to get people to understand when I say “my ear hurts” that looking inside is not going to help!

sick again! and sick of it!

argh, i just cannot seem to keep from getting sick! if this is strep again, i don't know what i'll do. my doctor is too busy to see me (also the receptionist seemed to think strep could wait until next week - sure, i'll still be sick next week if i don't see a doc before then, but by that point my son will be sick again too) although the phone message says she is still accepting new patients. unbelievable!

anyway, today i finally finally have an appointment with the pain specialist. referral was sent in 11 months ago. last december i was told he'd see me in july, he has rescheduled twice since then. i guess they figure chronic issues aren't urgent? feh.

didn't i say i was going to stop complaining? looks like nothing changes...

oh, and i'm getting my braces adjusted today too. fun stuff.

a new beginning

well i was looking through this blog the other day (to find "before" pictures of my teeth to show my husband, and i realised how it has devolved into complaining rather than any kind of progress. hmm. it has been a very difficult summer, because with three hours of commuting every day i really haven't had time to exercise or cook properly, especially with the added hurdle of finding most foods i like difficult to chew. and work has been idiotically stressful.

but now, everything is changing. work is still stressful (moreso, actually) but with the kiddo off to "big kid school" i won't be driving all over the city anymore - he'll be on a schoolbus! and instead of me dressing him while he's still asleep and both of us eating breakfast in the car, we'll be able to eat a proper breakfast at home. and the end of summer means the start of porridge. yum.

also, i'll be packing lunches for the kiddo, so that's making me think more about the kind of nutritious portable things we both can eat, although i probably be relying on the old "soup plus two kinds of fruit" formula since i have the chewing issue. but at least soup weather is here!

today i have much cleaning and organizing to do, and i hope to get a few make-ahead dinners into the freezer. but getting home from work earlier also means i'll have more time to cook a proper meal in the evening. yay!

and, i just picked up a bicycle - a better-size frame for me to ride than my old one. the short ride home wore me out a bit (i'm still panting, 10 minutes and a glass of water later), but it's pretty steamy out right now, so i'm hoping that with better weather and more regular riding i'll be back in form soon. and maybe i can get back to trying running again, too! but for now, baby steps. if i can just get back to eating healthy breakfasts & riding the bicycle to work, that will be two huge steps in the right direction.

now i've gone and done it

stubbed my toe *again*! and it really hurts. not "broken" hurts, but
"you really shouldn't have done that" hurts. trying to find a way to sit
at my desk comfortably, and failing. i wonder if it's worth asking
security if they have a cooling pad/ice pack?

wah.

rough week

this has been a bit of a crap week, with lots of rain, braces disappointment, and general i-wish-i-was-still-at-the-cottage-ness. i felt so much better up there! combination i think of better air, more rest, more exercise, better food. in the city i find it so much harder to find the time for everything in a day, plus the humidity makes it difficult to cook & difficult to sleep.

made it to the farmers' market yesterday though for strawberries (i can't believe we are still getting local strawbs in august!), peaches, pears, cherries (harry's eaten almost all of them already), sweet onion, tomatoes, and garlic. last night had whole-wheat pasta with pesto made from farmers' market garlic and basil from the garden. and then ate a bunch of strawbs, feel a bit better today. although the kiddo's similar wish-i-was-still-at-the-cottage mood is expressing itself in the form of bedtime tantrums, which is wearing us all out.

it's a bit cooler today, so maybe i'll buy a whole bunch of tomatoes and roast them. roasted tomato sauce = yum.

i do need to get some exercise though. i really have to fetch that bicycle so i can ride between the kid's pre-school and subway, even if it's only for a couple of weeks (also because i hate driving in the city with a white-hot passion). at the cottage i was swimming, walking, or canoeing every day. here i do nothing but walk from the subway or parking lot to the office! and even that bothers my poor left toe.